To the seconds we spend so alone

Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two...

Thu, 23 May 2013 01:58:19 -0400

Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two thugs raped her 18-year-old granddaughter that she tracked the unsuspecting ex-cons down… And shot off their testicles.

“The old lady spent a week hunting those men down and, when she found them, she took revenge on them in her own special way,” said police investigator Evan Delp.

Then she took a taxi to the nearest police station, laid the gun on the sergeant’s desk and told him as calm as could be: “Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God.”

Cops say convicted rapist and robber Davis Furth, 33, lost both his penis and his testicles when outraged Ava opened fire with a 9-mm pistol in the hotel room where he and former prison cell mate Stanley Thomas, 29, were holed up.

The wrinkled avenger also blew Thomas’ testicles to kingdom come, but doctors managed to save his mangled penis, police said. “The one guy, Thomas, didn’t lose his manhood, but the doctor I talked to said he won’t be using it the way he used to,” Detective Delp told reporters. “Both men are still in pretty bad shape, but I think they’re just happy to be alive after what they’ve been through.”

The Rambo Granny swung into action August 21 after her granddaughter Debbie was carjacked and raped in broad daylight by two knife-wielding creeps in a section of town bordering on skid row. “When I saw the look on my Debbie’s face that night in the hospital, I decided I was going to go out and get those bastards myself ‘cause I figured the Law would go easy on them,”’ recalled the retired library worker. ” And I wasn’t scared of them, either - because I’ve got me a gun and I’ve been shooting’ all my life. And I wasn’t dumb enough to turn it in when the law changed about owning one.”

So, using a police artist’s sketch of the suspects and Debbie’s description of the sickos, tough-as-nails Ava spent seven days prowling the wino-infested neighbourhood where the crime took place till she spotted the ill-fated rapists entering their flophouse hotel.

“I knew it was them the minute I saw ‘em, but I shot a picture of ‘em anyway and took it back to Debbie and she said sure as hell, it was them,” the oldster recalled…

“So I went back to that hotel and found their room and knocked on the door, and the minute the big one opened the door, I shot ‘em right square between the legs, right where it would really hurt ‘em most, you know. Then I went in and shot the other one as he backed up pleading to me to spare him. Then I went down to the police station and turned myself in.”

Now, baffled lawmen are trying to figure out exactly how to deal with the vigilante granny.. “What she did was wrong, and she broke the law, but it is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison,” Det. Delp said, “especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor.”

u-kill-me-in-a-good-way: violettesilence: jesuislegrandefromage: montypythonandtheholyblog: hotda...

Tue, 21 May 2013 22:56:58 -0400

u-kill-me-in-a-good-way:

violettesilence:

jesuislegrandefromage:

montypythonandtheholyblog:

hotdamnope:

kangiku:

the 12 year olds on this website get really mad if you point out the fact that they’re 12

r u serious

NOT EVERY 12 OLD GETS REALLY ANGRY

jesues sometimes people are just so dumb ughh

this is almost as fun as playing spot the vegan.

Spot the vegan? Yeah…the vegan is the one who isn’t killing or harming animals just because “They taste good.”

Found the vegan.

michaonthemoon: yaoibutts: I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means...

Sat, 18 May 2013 23:37:15 -0400

michaonthemoon:

yaoibutts:

I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means “earth apple.”

like what stupid frenchman saw this:

and said “zis petite légume looks like a, how you say, APPLE! hmmm… but it grows in ze earth… HON HON HON! MAIS OUI! C’EST UNE POMME DE TERRE!”

j’adore comment ananas se dit pineapple en anglais, ce qui veut littéralement dire “pomme de pin”, genre quel type anglais a vu ça:

et s’est dit : “ow cette étrange big fruit ressemble à une, how do you say, POMME! hmmm… mais plutôt une pomme qui pousse dans les pins… HU HU HU! OH YES, IT’S A PINEAPPLE!”

michaonthemoon: yaoibutts: I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means...

Sat, 18 May 2013 23:36:30 -0400

michaonthemoon:

yaoibutts:

I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means “earth apple.”

like what stupid frenchman saw this:

and said “zis petite légume looks like a, how you say, APPLE! hmmm… but it grows in ze earth… HON HON HON! MAIS OUI! C’EST UNE POMME DE TERRE!”

j’adore comment ananas se dit pineapple en anglais, ce qui veut littéralement dire “pomme de pin”, genre quel type anglais a vu ça:

et s’est dit : “ow cette étrange big fruit ressemble à une, how do you say, POMME! hmmm… mais plutôt une pomme qui pousse dans les pins… HU HU HU! OH YES, IT’S A PINEAPPLE!”

Sat, 18 May 2013 20:30:28 -0400

wow.

bowlingforsoup: how many haters does it take to change a lightbulb? none. they fear change, even if...

Sat, 18 May 2013 12:25:16 -0400

bowlingforsoup:

how many haters does it take to change a lightbulb? none. they fear change, even if it can make the world a brighter place.

naamahdarling: kwisten: fibromyalgiaproblems: “But don’t let your illness stop you!!!1!1!!” I’m...

Sat, 18 May 2013 12:23:03 -0400

naamahdarling:

kwisten:

fibromyalgiaproblems:

“But don’t let your illness stop you!!!1!1!!”

I’m not “letting” my illness stop me it just plain IS stopping me it’s an ILLNESS it makes me ILL that’s what it DOES.

Everyone needs to read this.

Seriously. People seriously do not fucking understand the concept of “SICK AND WILL NOT GET BETTER,” or “NO, ACTUALLY, THERE’S SHIT I CAN’T FUCKING DO.”

So my brothers old friend committed suicide on friday. Just found out today; they used to be best...

Tue, 14 May 2013 00:55:56 -0400

So my brothers old friend committed suicide on friday. Just found out today; they used to be best friends and he was such a good kid i feel so bad that no one was there or that no one could help him. Its fucking weird because i had a bad feeling and i had been thinking about him for a few days and now he’s dead.

R.I.P. sean

i’m really sorry

Sun, 12 May 2013 00:13:49 -0400

You know what the worst thing about sitting in the dark is?

creepturtle: feefeeri: that-snowflake-sure-is-special: Here’s...

Thu, 09 May 2013 15:21:55 -0400

creepturtle:

feefeeri:

that-snowflake-sure-is-special:

Here’s a new entry for my list of reasons why I love Gordon Ramsay.

Gordon

Ramsay

gordon ramsay’s cook-along blog

"Why Society Still Needs Feminism Because to men, a key is a device to open something. For women,..."

Thu, 09 May 2013 09:19:07 -0400

“

Why Society Still Needs Feminism

Because to men, a key is a device to open something. For women, it’s a weapon we hold between our fingers when we’re walking alone at night.

Because the biggest insult for a guy is to be called a “pussy,” a “little bitch” or a “girl.” From here on out, being called a “pussy” is an effing badge of honor.

Because last month, my politics professor asked the class if women should have equal representation in the Supreme Court, and only three out of 42 people raised their hands.

Because rape jokes are still a thing.

Because despite being equally broke college kids, guys are still expected to pay for dates, drinks and flowers.

Because as a legit student group, Campus Fellowship does not allow women to lead anything involving men. Look, I know Eve was dumb about the whole apple and snake thing, but I think we can agree having a vagina does not directly impact your ability to lead a
college organization.

Because it’s assumed that if you are nice to a girl, she owes you sex — therefore, if she turns you down, she’s a bitch who’s put you in the “friend zone.” Sorry, bro, women are not machines you put kindness coins into until sex falls out.

Because only 29 percent of American women identify as feminist, and in the words of author Caitlin Moran, “What part of ‘liberation for women’ is not for you? Is it freedom to vote? The right not to be owned by the man you marry? The campaign for equal pay? Did all that good shit get on your nerves? Or were you just drunk at the time
of the survey?”

Because when people hear the term feminist, they honestly think of women burning bras. Dude, have you ever bought a bra? No one would burn them because they’re freaking
expensive.

Because Rush Limbaugh.

Because we now have a record number of women in the Senate … which is a measly 20 out of 100. Congrats, USA, we’ve gone up to 78th place for women’s political representation, still below China, Rwanda and Iraq.

Because recently I had a discussion with a couple of well-meaning Drake University guys, and they literally could not fathom how catcalling a woman walking down University Avenue is creepy and sexist.
Could. Not. Fathom.

Because on average, the tenured male professors at Drake make more than the tenured female professors.

Because more people on campus complain about chalked statistics regarding sexual assault than complain about the existence of sexual assault. Priorities? Have them.

Because 138 House Republicans voted against the Violence Against Women Act. All 138 felt it shouldn’t provide support for Native women, LGBT people or immigrant women. I’m kind of confused by this, because I thought LGBT people and women of color were also human beings.
Weird, right?

Because a girl was roofied last semester at a local campus bar, and I heard someone say they think she should have been more careful. Being drugged is her fault, not the fault of the person who put drugs in her drink?

Because Chris Brown beat Rihanna so badly she was hospitalized, yet he still has fans and bestselling songs and a tattoo of an abused woman on his neck.

Because out of 7 billion people on the planet, more than 1 billion women will be raped or beaten in their lifetimes. Women and girls have their clitorises cut out, acid thrown on them and broken bottles shoved up them as an act of war. Every second of every day. Every corner of the Earth.

Because the other day, another friend of mine told me she was raped, and I can no longer count on both my hands the number of friends who have told me they’ve been sexually assaulted. Words can’t express how scared I am that I’m getting used to this.

Because a brief survey of reality will tell you that we do not live in a world that values all people equally and that sucks in real, very scary ways. Because you know we live in a sexist world when an awesome thing with the name “feminism” has a weird connotation. Because if I have kids someday, I want my son to be able to have emotions and play dress up, and I want my daughter to climb trees and care more about what’s in her head than what’s on it. Because I don’t want her to carry keys between her fingers at night to
protect herself.

Because feminism is for everybody, and this is your official invitation.

”

- Caitlin O’Donnell, Drake University. (via on-another-note)

infinitylooper: Something to think about: The Earth is 4.6...

Thu, 09 May 2013 01:42:39 -0400

infinitylooper:

Something to think about:

The Earth is 4.6 billion years old. Let’s scale that to 46 years.
We have been here for 4 hours. Our industrial revolution began 1 minute ago.
In that time, we have destroyed more than 50% of the world’s forests.

This isn’t sustainable.

onediwreckingmylife: at monash university in melbourne the women’s department had a bake sale and...

Thu, 09 May 2013 01:42:13 -0400

onediwreckingmylife:

at monash university in melbourne the women’s department had a bake sale and cupcakes were one dollar for men and eighty cents for women and seventy cents for trans* people to represent the wage gap and heaps of guys kicked off about it being sexist and that’s how i finally understood how hypocritical and ignorant men’s rights activism is

"Here’s the thing. Men in our culture have been socialized to believe that their opinions on women’s..."

Wed, 08 May 2013 23:52:32 -0400

“Here’s the thing. Men in our culture have been socialized to believe that their opinions on women’s appearance matter a lot. Not all men buy into this, of course, but many do. Some seem incapable of entertaining the notion that not everything women do with their appearance is for men to look at. This is why men’s response to women discussing stifling beauty norms is so often something like “But I actually like small boobs!” and “But I actually like my women on the heavier side, if you know what I mean!” They don’t realize that their individual opinion on women’s appearance doesn’t matter in this context, and that while it might be reassuring for some women to know that there are indeed men who find them fuckable, that’s not the point of the discussion.

Women, too, have been socialized to believe that the ultimate arbiters of their appearance are men, that anything they do with their appearance is or should be “for men.” That’s why women’s magazines trip over themselves to offer up advice on “what he wants to see you wearing” and “what men think of these current fashion trends” and “wow him with these new hairstyles.” While women can and do judge each other’s appearance harshly, many of us grew up being told by mothers, sisters, and female strangers that we’ll never “get a man” or “keep a man” unless we do X or lose some fat from Y, unless we moisturize/trim/shave/push up/hide/show/”flatter”/paint/dye/exfoliate/pierce/surgically alter this or that.

That’s also why when a woman wears revealing clothes, it’s okay, in our society, to assume that she’s “looking for attention” or that she’s a slut and wants to sleep with a bunch of guys. Because why else would a woman wear revealing clothes if not for the benefit of men and to communicate her sexual availability to them, right? It can’t possibly have anything to do with the fact that it’s hot out or it’s more comfortable or she likes how she looks in it or everything else is in the laundry or she wants to get a tan or maybe she likes women and wants attention from them, not from men?

The result of all this is that many men, even kind and well-meaning men, believe, however subconsciously, that women’s bodies are for them. They are for them to look at, for them to pass judgment on, for them to bless with a compliment if they deign to do so. They are not for women to enjoy, take pride in, love, accept, explore, show off, or hide as they please. They are for men and their pleasure.”

- Why You Shouldn’t Tell That Random Girl On The Street That She’s Hot » Brute Reason (via brute-reason)

thegeekyblonde: gehayi: thegeekyblonde: where were french fries first cooked? If you’re serious,...

Wed, 08 May 2013 23:33:48 -0400

thegeekyblonde:

gehayi:

thegeekyblonde:

where were french fries first cooked?

If you’re serious, probably Spain (which was the first European country to have access to the potato), Belgium (which had fries by WWI and which were called “Belgian fries), or France (Thomas Jefferson, in 1802, brought the recipe of French chef Honoré Julien to America). France has the best claim of the three; there’s a distinct recipe and a fairly early date.

in GREASE

tattooeddicks: pizzalecki: pkmnbreederbrianna: togamijail: ch...

Wed, 08 May 2013 23:29:59 -0400

tattooeddicks:

pizzalecki:

pkmnbreederbrianna:

togamijail:

chandra75:

im-sherlocked-in-my-mindpalace:

socially-awkward-supervillian:

Fun fact: Cheetahs only attack pray that runs

jesus that is good to know.

Yup, that’s the point you just stay still and let it do whatever the fuck it wants that doesn’t involved you getting eaten.

REALLY FUN FACT for big cats cheetahs are fucking docile as shit

my grandfather ran a cheetah sanctuary in south africa and he’d just lie with them and sleep among them and they’d rub against him and chirp at him they’re big fucking babies

Another Fun Fact: Cheetah’s are incredibly nervous animals. One of the (many) reason’s they’re going extinct is that cheetah’s are so sensitive and nervous, some of them are literally too nervous to breed. Other’s will breed, but stress themselves out so much, they’ll loose their cubs.

So zoo’s with breeding program’s had to figure out how to make Cheetah’s comfortable enough to first of all, get laid and secondly - not spazz themselves into miscarrying.

So what’d they do?
They gave the cheetah’s their very own Service Dogs!

The dogs make them feel safe, protected and secure!

AJHHHHFDDGHH SO PRECIOUS

CHEETAH SERVICE DOGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

queensassyofthefatties: Lewis’s law is an observation she made...

Wed, 08 May 2013 23:06:36 -0400

queensassyofthefatties:

Lewis’s law is an observation she made in 2012 that states “the comments on any article about feminism justify feminism.” Lewis has written frequently about misogynist hate directed at women online.^[8]

Can we just repeat that a few more times,

“The comments on any article about feminism justify feminism.”

“The comments on any article about feminism justify feminism.”

psych-facts: More here

Wed, 08 May 2013 14:08:03 -0400

psych-facts:

More here

cjwho: Flexible Wooden Bookshelf Warps to Wrap All Book Sizes

Wed, 08 May 2013 09:54:37 -0400

cjwho:

Flexible Wooden Bookshelf Warps to Wrap All Book Sizes

Friendly reminder that: You are not weak if you want meds for your disorder You are not weak if you...

Wed, 08 May 2013 09:39:39 -0400

Friendly reminder that:

You are not weak if you want meds for your disorder

You are not weak if you relapse once

You are not weak if you relapse a thousand times

You are not weak if some kinds of therapy don’t work for you

You are not weak if some kinds of meds don’t work for you

You are not weak if you have a mental disorder

To the seconds we spend so alone

Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two...

u-kill-me-in-a-good-way: violettesilence: jesuislegrandefromage: montypythonandtheholyblog: hotda...

michaonthemoon: yaoibutts: I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means...

michaonthemoon: yaoibutts: I love how potato in French is pomme de terre, which pretty much means...

bowlingforsoup: how many haters does it take to change a lightbulb? none. they fear change, even if...

naamahdarling: kwisten: fibromyalgiaproblems: “But don’t let your illness stop you!!!1!1!!” I’m...

So my brothers old friend committed suicide on friday. Just found out today; they used to be best...

creepturtle: feefeeri: that-snowflake-sure-is-special: Here’s...

"Why Society Still Needs Feminism Because to men, a key is a device to open something. For women,..."

infinitylooper: Something to think about: The Earth is 4.6...

The Earth is 4.6 billion years old. Let’s scale that to 46 years. We have been here for 4 hours. Our industrial revolution began 1 minute ago. In that time, we have destroyed more than 50% of the world’s forests.

onediwreckingmylife: at monash university in melbourne the women’s department had a bake sale and...

"Here’s the thing. Men in our culture have been socialized to believe that their opinions on women’s..."

thegeekyblonde: gehayi: thegeekyblonde: where were french fries first cooked? If you’re serious,...

tattooeddicks: pizzalecki: pkmnbreederbrianna: togamijail: ch...

queensassyofthefatties: Lewis’s law is an observation she made...

psych-facts: More here

cjwho: Flexible Wooden Bookshelf Warps to Wrap All Book Sizes

Friendly reminder that: You are not weak if you want meds for your disorder You are not weak if you...

The Earth is 4.6 billion years old. Let’s scale that to 46 years.
We have been here for 4 hours. Our industrial revolution began 1 minute ago.
In that time, we have destroyed more than 50% of the world’s forests.